Road to Bash at the Beach

Obviously, the focus for the next month is Flair/Funk. We pull up the 1989 footage, hell run the Funk/Flair match on one of the B-Level shows one of the weeks w/ wrap arounds to hype it up. We sell Funk as completely and totally over-the-edge and after a few years of being away, he's seemed to have gone even crazier than he was five years. Meanwhile, Flair is getting close as well. His closest friend has turned on him and he's facing probably his toughest opponent in a month.

On the other end, Arn Anderson is the picture of cool, calm, and collective. Until Ricky Steamboat enters the picture. Ricky says that the one thing that he thought Arn had was loyalty, if nothing else. But, he's even that tossed that away for greater glory. Arn fires back. What do you know about loyalty? Loyalty is suppressing your talent for a decade so your best friend can be seen as the best wrestler in the world. Doing the dirty work, the sneak attacks, all the work while Flair is in a hotel room with three twenty-year olds.

So, there's your top two matches. Flair/Funk & Steamboat/Arn.

But, that's not all. Jack & Sullivan are happy. Crazy still. That ain't gonna' change. However, one week on Saturday Night, they get challenged by Harlem Heat for a title match. They say they've got a new manager who has led men to champions before and this manager will do the same. Booker & Stevie are still mid-card heels, so Cactus & Kevin agree...then start a brawl. Like I said, crazy. We get vignettes with either Booker & Stevie on the phone with their mystery manager before matches. There's your tag main event.

Hey, how about Sting? Sting's probably feeling lonely. He wasn't even on the Clash. He's getting his fans, but he has no hook. That is, until he follows up a Steve Austin squash and hears Austin claiming to be the greatest US champ...again. Sting comes out and say, "hmm...that's odd. I remember a few years ago pinning you right in the middle of the ring for the US Title." Austin says that was years ago, so the next week we get a Sting/Austin match as the TV main event. Match is back-and-forth, Austin is totally treated at Sting's level.

Sting gets the advantage and is about to slap on the Scorpion when the lights go out. (Yes, I'm stealing this from WCW.) Lights come back - Muta's in the ring! Muta's back! MIST! MIST!

Boom, Sting/Muta for the International Title. Now, how about Austin? Well, unfortunately, at least for this show, he's sort of a man without an island. So, after a Dusty/Dustin tag squash to build up the tag match at the PPV, Austin will come out and volunteer himself to be part of the Stud Stable vs. Rhodes Tag Match. Austin basically says he doesn't care who the Colonel finds as his partner, he just wants the chance to beat up both Rhode's at once. If Dusty is up to it, we'll do a Dusty/Austin match at a TV just to continue the hype.

So far, not a bad show? Right? Well, the fun continues. At a TV, Regal/Badd goes to a ten-minute draw, so we get a rematch with a 15 minute time limit at the PPV. Simple booking, kids. Sometimes, that's all it takes.

Then, on the undercard, we get wacky matches a go go as Terra Ryzing forms a mutual appreciation society with Pretty Wonderful, but they run afoul of The Guardian Angel when they continue a beatdown on some jobbers. Guardian gets Stars 'n' Stripes and we have a fun little six-man.

So, there's your card. Flair/Funk for the first time in five years. Arn/Steamboat. The Great Freakin' Muta returns to WCW to take the International Title away from Sting. Steve Austin and a partner battle the Rhodes. Regal/Badd in a rematch for the TV Title. Six-man madness w/ Terra Ryzing, Stars 'n' Stripes, Pretty Wonderful, and the Guardian Angel. Buy it!